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Monday, 31 March 2008


  • "I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible. And how it can actually ache in places you didn't know you had inside you. And it doesn't matter how many new haircuts you get, or gyms you join, or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends... you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood. And how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he'll see the light and show up at your door. And after all that, however long all that may be, you'll go somewhere new. And you'll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade."

Saturday, 15 March 2008

  • i think i may be losing myself.
    i just have to remember that no matter how close you follow the jumps, no matter how careful you are, there's going to be the sense you missed something, the collapsed feeling under your skin that you didn't experience it all. There's that fallen heart feeling that you rushed right through the moments where you should've been paying attention.

    get use to that feeling.. coz that's how your whole life is going to feel some day.

    i forgot that life's not fair.

    "Life is the ability to feel so happy, you think your insides are going to explode. It's being so upset or disappointed, you feel as if your stomach just dropped ten feet out of place. It's running so hard, you can barely breathe. It's the feeling of panic when you know you've been caught doing something wrong. It's having that sudden rush before you kiss someone you care about. It's opening your eyes and feeling them sting because you spent the whole night crying. It's letting people go because new ones come in, and all the while realizing that life doesn't have a purpose unless you let it."

    .....a very stupid and purposeless survey. ..

    10 random things about me
    1. i'm unbalanced.. i think
    2. i don't ever recognize the big occurances, the serious serious situations in life because they just NEVER feel big or serious
    3. i use to have an obsession for Patrick from Spongebob
    4. forgive and forget that is the rule.
    5. go for organic... i tryyyy i really do
    6. you only learn when you screw up, really!
    7. your first judgement is always the right one..... it's okay to judge.. cuz you might just be right.
    8. i enjoy watching foreign cooking shows
    9. strong interest in other cultures
    10. give everyone a chance. just one. it's not going to hurt.

    9 things that will win my heart
    1. willl
    2. not
    3. answer
    4. this
    5. question.
    6. ok!
    7. one
    8. thing-
    9. adventurous!

    8 things that I want to do before I die
    1. give back to my parents
    2. build a family
    3. travel travel travel with someone
    4. change someone's life
    5. get a freaking lil sis!!
    6. become the next Food Network celebrity. very serious.
    7. move to california
    8. live out of the country for a year at the least.

    7 things that annoy me
    1. clingy types.
    2. sensitivity
    3. blank stares
    4. homeless drunks
    5. ugly fingernails
    6. girls (and guys) who wear shirts that are too too tooo small for them.

    7. overacheivers.

    6 things I believe in
    1. things happen for a reason
    2. talent beats being smart
    3. there's always going to be a rainbow after every rain. there is going to be an end sometime sooner or later.
    4. heartbreaks are going to be tough, regardless.
    5. but later, looking back you'll always ask yourself why you were so stupid in the past.

    6. things will be much better if you live completely free : )

    5 things I am afraid of
    1. heartbreaks
    2.
    3.
    4.
    5.

    4 things I am thankful for
    1. mom
    2. dad
    3. Splash!
    4. compassionate strangers lol

    3 things I do everyday
    1. touch my hair
    2. yawn
    3. wear a beater

    2 things I want to do right now
    1. tv for my room
    2. ace this semester

    1 person I want to see right now
    1. somethings are better left unsaid. ;)

Tuesday, 30 August 2005

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